Self Care Tips for Moms Who are Burnt Out

Self Care Tips for Moms Who are Burnt Out

Realistic Self-Care Tips for Burnt-Out Moms of Littles

As moms, we tend to get the short end of the stick. We do so much for everyone else in our lives, that we tend to neglect ourselves in the process. 

You deserve guilt-free, nourishing self care. I know most of us don’t have the time or money for expensive spa days or weekend-long excursions, so that’s not what you’ll find here. 

I’m sharing self care tips for burnt out moms who just need a break. Moms that work so hard for their little ones and want to feel deserving of some downtime. Because you can’t pour from an empty cup, and you deserve to feel like you again.

A Note to the Tired Mama

If you’re feeling touched out, drained, or like you’re running on fumes, you’re not alone. I think most of us moms feel this way at some point or another. It’s important to remember that you are not the first or last mom to feel this way.

This isn’t about luxury or long getaways. This is about finding small, soul-filling moments in the chaos. The little things that fill your cup so you can get through this season. 

Self-care isn’t selfish. It’s sustainable motherhood. It’s giving yourself the mental space to come back and mother like no other. Let’s talk about real, doable, life-giving ideas that work in the trenches of toddler tantrums and endless laundry.

Mindset Shifts for Burnout Recovery

Before jumping into ideas, start with one of these gentle reminders when you’re feeling overwhelmed:

• Small bit of time: 5 minutes of calm matters. Don’t wait for a whole day off. Set a timer for five minutes, make sure your kids are safe and occupied and sit in silence and just breathe.
• Guilt has no place here: Resting makes you a more present mom, not a lazy one. You do not have to constantly be ‘on.’
• Micro self-care > no self-care: Even tiny acts shift your mood and mindset. Paint your nails a pretty color or go out into the yard and yell for thirty seconds.
• You’re still a whole person, not just “mom.” Dress in what makes you feel like you or make time to date your husband again.
  

Simple, Realistic Self-Care Tips for Exhausted Moms

Start (or End) the Day with 5 Quiet Minutes

Sit in silence before the house wakes up or after bedtime — no phone, no to-do list. I wake up an hour before my kid and for a while it was the worst. But after a week or two, I began looking forward to that time. 

It gave me a chance to center myself and get fully awake before I was bombarded with three year old energy. This doesn’t work for everyone, but it was an absolutely game changer for me.

About five minutes of that time (usually while my coffee is brewing) I stretch and let my body wake up. I don’t think about what needs to get done that day and I don’t try to rush through the time. It makes me more present throughout the rest of the day. I feel more in control of my emotions and am less likely to snap or get frustrated. 

Deep breaths, prayer, stretching, or just sipping coffee while it’s hot are all great ways to enjoy just a tiny bit of You Time. If you prefer to do it in the evenings, great. Want to sneak it in during nap time? That works too.

Use Screens for You, Too

I am to limit screen time to weekends and/or on super long road trips. However, there are just some days where you need a break. 

Maybe it’s that weird day or two right before everyone comes down with something. Perhaps it’s a day that everyone is at each other’s throats and you just need to NOT hear screaming. Maybe it’s day one of your cycle and the cramps are cramping.

Put on a show or play a safe video for the kids, then scroll something funny, inspiring, or just breathe. The Nesting Domestic Pinterest page is a great place to start!

Follow accounts that make you feel seen, not “less than.” I’ve got a whole post on how to make your phone less hectic and more enjoyable. 

Feed Yourself First 

There is a trope about moms flirting around refilling juice cups and making sure everyone has everything they need before finally sitting down to eat only to discover that their plate has gone cold. It’s a trope because it is true and common enough to be anecdotal. 

Don’t survive on cold coffee and toddler leftovers. Make your plate at the same time as everyone else and sit down to eat together. 

Your husband can refill a bottle. Your toddler can wait two minutes for more mashed potatoes. Heck, your four year old can go get a fork from the drawer by himself. 

I vividly remember being famished while breastfeeding and how cranky it made me. When I’m cranky, I’m more likely to get burnt out.

Prep a favorite smoothie or snack just for you. Eat it sitting down (even for 3 minutes). You can check out this post for toddler snacks that work for moms too.

Create a Mini Escape

We all need to escape every now and then. When you can’t actually get away, try a pared down version to fill your cup. 

Hide in the pantry with chocolate? Acceptable. Better: grab an apple and take a walk around the neighborhood. Maybe alone, but probably with your kiddos who could also use the fresh air. More on that below. 

Carve out time to read a chapter of a book, listen to a podcast, or take a warm shower with music. I’ve got a great post on how to make time for reading (plus it’s got a list of some of my favorite books!). 

Use noise-canceling headphones with calming music to give yourself a mental reset. Find a few minutes To move your body, even if it’s a ten minute run or a quick yoga session before bed. 

Get Outside

Even if it is just to your own backyard, fresh air makes a world of difference in your household’s mood. It’s a reset that can help you avoid burning out. 

Nature helps regulate your nervous system, giving you ample mental space and a calmer disposition. Breathe fresh air, even if you’re holding a baby monitor. 

Go for a stroller walk with no agenda. Let the sun hit your face. Ask you kiddo what they see. Name the colors around you or count the birds. Stop and let your toddler pick up rocks. Seriously, what is it with toddlers and rocks?!

Stop to admire someone’s porch décor or watch the sunset. Raining? Bring a raincoat. Let your kid splash in puddles. These boots have held up SO well with my rambunctious three year old. 

Cold? Bundle up and then reward yourself with hot chocolate or tea. Hot? Play in the sprinkler. Being outside will adjust your attitude. If you do it daily, I’m willing to bet you’ll start to feel farther and farther from your breaking point.  

Touch That Feels Good 

Being touched out is a THING. I did not get it before having a kid, but it’s really! Little hands on you in some form or fashion all day long is stress inducing and draining. 

Give yourself simple pleasure to lower the threshold for being touched out. 

• Apply lotion slowly 
• Give yourself a scalp massage in the shower
• Swap leggings for something that makes you feel nice
  • A soft scarf
  • A silky skirt
  • A cozy sweater

Connect with Another Adult

Once again with the mom tropes! Stay at home moms can feel starved for genuine conversation when they’re been wiping noses and deciphering toddler rambling all day. Use small snippets of time to reconnect with someone that doesn’t need a car seat.

Text a friend “thinking of you.” There’s no pressure to chat, but it will make you feel nice and possibly strike up a conversation. 

Call your girlfriend or mom friend (or even better, FaceTime!) while you’re doing dishes. Something I didn’t even realize I was missing was a friend to do menial tasks with.

My best friends live in different states, and I missed having someone to run errands with or just sit on the couch and pretend to clean up with. By FaceTiming or calling, we get to catch up. I feel heard and am reminded that there are other people in my boat.

Send a funny meme. Ask someone how they are with no expectation of them asking about your life. When we are genuinely interested in other people, they tend to be interested in us
Put it on your shared calendar to spend 20 minutes with your spouse without the distraction of screens. Talk about your vendetta with the squirrels in the backyard or how you really don’t want to go to the dentist but you know it’s important. Have deep, meaningful conversations or silly, unimportant ones. 

Feeling seen is powerful when you’re feeling invisible. By connecting with other adults, you’re less likely to keep everything bottled up, and thus, less likely to burn out. Are you noticing a theme here?

Plan a Little Joy to Look Forward To

Make moments happen that bring you happiness, even if especially if they’re small. This could mean:

• A solo Target run with a coffee
• Scheduling a nap, a walk alone, or a drive with music
• Making time to garden without distraction
• Planning a concert six months from now with your girlfriends
• Ordering an outfit/water bottle/closet organizer that makes your heart happy and your life less stressful

Having something on the calendar that’s for YOU can carry you through hard days. Don’t keep pushing off caring for yourself until there is more time. That moment won’t come. 

You need to actively, daily, work at making small moments for yourself. Even if you don’t find time every single day to do something extra for yourself, using these tips can compound tremendously. 

Go to Bed Earlier Than You Want To

This is one that I still struggle with, even though I’ve started waking up earlier. You deserve “me time,” but sleep is the most powerful self-care tool of all.

Sometimes it’s just not manageable to get to bed early every single night, but the key here is to try. Try just once a week going to bed 30 minutes earlier. You will feel a difference in your mood and your ability to cope with your daily affairs. 

You know your kiddos need their rest. I’m willing to bet you make sure they get it. Protect your rest like you do theirs.

Let Something Go

When you’re burnt out, it can be difficult to get everything done. Say no to extra commitments. Do not – I REPEAT: DO NOT – burden yourself with extras when you are struggling to stay afloat. 

Even if that means taking a break from just your regular obligations, do so until you can level yourself out.  Ignore the dishes tonight. Let the toys stay out.

Don’t make a habit of doing so, but be self aware enough to realize the days where you just need to take a break. Give yourself permission to do less, and feel no guilt.

Encouragement for the Burnt Out Mom

• You’re not failing, you’re doing your best in a demanding season.
• Needing rest, space, or help doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’re human.
• You are worthy of care, attention, and rest, just like everyone else you love. Give yourself permission to accept those things. 

For more opportunities for self care, check out my 30 day self care challenge. These are easy, actionable ideas for self care. And the best part? It’s totally free! 

Comment below and let me know your favorite realistic self care tips for moms who are burnt out.